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How to Respond If Someone Calls You a Sell-Out For Dating Interracially

April 19, 2012

Unfortunately, many people who are open to love from potential partners of all races face a backlash from family and friends who believe that everyone should just stick to their own kind.  This appears to be a particularly harsh problem for black women who want to date outside of their race because of the history of black women being sexually exploited during colonialism and slavery as well as modern day prostitution and sex trafficking in women.  My mother-in-law, who is an older African woman, advised my sister-in-law, her daughter, not to date white men because people will assume that my sister-in-law is a prostitute.  Atrocious!  Clearly, there may be challenges that interracial couples face because of societal stereotyping and ignorance.  But all relationships face challenges which are hopefully offset by abundant rewards.  Loveessence, a romantic networking site for black women, encourages black women to be open to black love as well as interracial love because we believe that LOVE IS ENOUGH to conquer any challenges.

Please see our advice regarding how to respond if someone calls you a sell-out for dating interracially as posted on Interracial Intersection for Black Women on August 14, 2011.

Loveessence on Interracial Intersection for Black Women

I’m getting the love that I want, period.


That is the only answer worth repeating.  There is no need to become defensive.  There is no need to go into statistics about the number of eligible black men.  There is no reason to discuss your past experiences with black men, white men, or men of any other race.  There is no need to discuss where and how you were raised.  All of that is irrelevant.


When you have envisioned the love that you want whether it be a love that is based on shared spirituality, intellectual stimulation, emotional healing and or sexual ecstasy then the race, color, creed,  nationality or the occupation of the man who gives it becomes less important.


Finding a romantic partner is challenging and how dare others attempt to make this more arduous by restricting  whom we can love.


Sisters, tell the haters that they can just shove it!  You are brilliant and beautiful and you deserve the love that you have been dreaming of regardless of the race of the man who gives it.

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